How big is your loss?

Can you annihilate the fires of a mother
standing near the pyre of her son?
Or can you pierce the ears of a just married girl
with her sharp edged dreams
whose husband is in the last stage of cancer?

Can you give enough money to a widow
stretching her white shirt
who is unsure if she could breastfeed the infant?
Or can you come to give medicine to an old lady lying sick
beaten with slippers by her drunken sons?

Can you embrace a woman everynight
when her husband brings a prostitute at home?
Or can you pamper and make a young girl laugh
when her father rapes her frequently?

Tell me today, how big is your loss?
Is is darker than their pains?
Is it mournful than their sorrows?
Is it bigger than their loss?

If yes, then go!
Kill yourself!
But after consoling atleast them
as theirs is bearable than yours.

And if no, then go to a temple,
after almost an age,
and thank God, thank your parents,
for giving you this life,
which is far far beautiful
than even angels could ever recognize.


Sim

Expressions

If there were words for you, for us,
I would have lassoed them long ago.

Proficient speakers are attractive
and can be equally manipulative.
Spurting many colors
on the plain waves of mind,
they leave on one's heart
to smell few misty colors.
And destitution chains
when they unlock their eyes
and fix it to other's in the assemblage.

But I am not that kind.
I will go along standing, beside you, only you.

It's like a gold mine, with small pieces,
which draws in everybody, completely.
And people revisit empty caves,
for ages, claiming their shares.

But have you ever wished a jewelry
made from the undiscovered metals of meteors
falling on living grounds just for you?

Brains could learn all the possible languages
but it's unfortunate that we could converse very few.
Silence continues to charm.

Regarding writing, only thing I don't like
is that my emotions pegged at some point
reach you at a different time, at a different point.
And this gap is the space between us.


Sim

Ripples

Often, in our bedroom
after hours of midnight
we lie unsleeping
in one blanket
with similar dreams
floating differently.
Defenseless,
my bare breaths
fall on your back
in dark
and lose somewhere.

After you say,
"I'm tired",
eveytime,
I cannot force
but wait for you
unclothing yourself
for us
to make love
once
like never before.

You make your lips
red in the morning
while our necks,
all night,
burn dry.

Sex is not I desire,
I want you to be free
with me
before we touch
even shadows.


Sim

A return

Air touches me again
giving a million melting hugs.

Through days of drifting
from an inseparable part of me, from myself,
I discovered the heaven
in the floors of my home.

Diamonds are earned outside
and value is realised after losing
but love works the opposite way.

It is not earned.
It's true value is realised being in it.
And it can never be traded,
not even for a drop.

I know, I will be growing only
from here.


Sim

You are your faithful mirror

Exhausted return with thirsts of today
and dusty layers of yesterdays on feet,
eyes fix on the only glassful water.

Drink it! You will be more relieved.

The heart is not a working machine.
Anger, sadness, aloofness are also feelings
living inside the pressure nerves of body.

Let steam pass! Don't hold it.

Ask a father his wishes for daughter,
ask a mother how pure her image is,
ask a sister how strong her force is
ask self how to make them prouder
ask self how to bloom fully inside.

Your roots hold all the fragrances.

Don't wait for anyone to fulfill dreams.
Don't lie awake waiting opportunities.
As fresh as the raindrops over leaves,
as innocent as the infant's first smile,
as beautiful as the hues in sky
before sunset or before sunrise,

You are the bestest.

Get up, my child,
surge ahead towards your goals
with very own shine of ever warm eyes
which will burn all sorrows, all pain
and will caress you softly in its lap
till eternity.


Sim

...

With each shortest move
of the clock's hand,
I feel like an old radio
whose knob is turning
anti-clockwise. :)

Coal

In a pod filled with backyard mud,
a seed is germinating a plant
to bloom the flowers of black bones.

Room changed to a secluded prison
where air is a red sea.
And new asthma is the clapper
hitting the graveyard bell, at wish.

Embers are burning heavily
inside the brothels of this head.
When the whole city gets polluted
with the smokes of my headaches,
don't touch to baptise this unsacred heart.


Sim

Devoid

Unmoving on bed,
after words submerge,
I never remember when
my conscience leaves me
and reaches silent places
wandering street to sreet
searching your giggles.

And when it's unable to pay,
I would sell myself
if it could bring your lightest smile.

In front of strangers
reading old stories
from the untouched strips,
I am spending a lifetime
pulling out every eyelash
to fly from hand's back
for you to wish all desires.

And when it goes unheard,
I would pull myself
if it could grant your smallest liking.


Sim

Talks

When your words srike mine
like wind touching crystal chimes,
you sound as a musician
playing at my roof,
wet with fresh rain.

You reflect crescent moon
when you talk non-stop
and I forget myself
when you laugh in between.

I keep on dissolving clouds
and peace of twilight
into few bangles
of your favorite colors;
but how do I clasp your fist
and put these,
when a moment falls abruptly
onto my feet
and you disappear
leaving me searching
atleast a bye?

Regardless of everything,
40 minutes with you
are the most relieving.
I almost take a rebirth, everytime.


Sim

She moved...

Fever to fire the flame
Energy to entice her expanse
She moved ...moved with all her might
Day and night and night and day
Alas her share silently went away
Tiara sparkled ...Oh on her friend's shape
Deffered success or an unfair game she proclaim
Few folks fair as the Father
Few fake bluff with perfect poise
While others play plain
She moved..moved with caution
Anger,animosity,impatience , rage
She moved numbed though with faith
Silent moderator will measure matter
Means and move and every mode
For she may fizzle and miss the boat
The invisible will remedy their soul
She moved...moved with a spirit so sure

Shelly

If

If, in the middle of night,
you sit clasping a silken dream,
and I stand very close to you,
will you slowly close your eyes
and not open till I say?
If, then, I whisper something
slowly, in that cold breeze,
after moving aside an earring,
will your warm smiles catch
my falling breaths?

If, we meet sometime,
as strangers in a train,
having different stops,
will you forget yours
or ask me, to accompany you?
And while walking in the unknown streets,
will you ask me once if I fag, or booze?

And if we part again,
howsoever far you go,
when ahead seems blurred,
will you turn back your eyes,
standing still,
for me to take care of rest?


Sim

Paper

This is not a poem
but a piece of paper,
flamed from all edges.

The realities hushing
in its layers
will be visible
in frail remnants.

The golden fumes,
carrying smell of dreams,
are smokes,
if not pleasing you.

The curling sides,
sliding dreams to centre,
are ashes,
if not reaching you.


sim

Low-pitched

I am freezing as an old snail.
Will you take me to the Sun
and its sterile realms?
Let me abandon these
vermillion sludges in eyes.

I had taken the parallel road.

How shall I lie flat on this round Earth?
Tell me some place which
every cell of this body can share peacefully.

I hadn't embraced from behind.

Will you paint me black,
blacker than your cries?
Let me tease the lost nights.

I hadn't absorbed all colors.

But listen, don't defile my remains
pouring your thanks and sorry.

I had called home when you were outside.


Sim

...

Dry brain is like a deaf-and-dumb baby
sitting alone near a burned skull.
How hard shall I shout in his ears
or shall I softly pamper?

Dark heart is like a glass vase,
having few white petals at bottom,
filled with black pond water.
What light shall I throw from outside
or shall I drown inside?

Thin body which I am wearing
is no better than the only plain shirt
which some girl has to wear and walk amid crowd.
What way shall I position my hands
Or shall I keep these eyes under feet?


Sim

Untitled

(Prologue- I swear, I will try
not to exaggerate today...,
trust me!)


Through days I sit gazing
in hope of a few words,
reassuring myself that you still
think something about me...

I keep changing my sides
half sleeping at nights
thinking that you are close...
somewhere assuring me of you.

Though it's been only a year
but not a single moment I remember
when not I want to support you,
when not I want to comfort you.
I somehow couldn't ...

If there are Gods then I pray
that you get all reasons to smile
and your tears reach these eyes
for I need a part of your life.

Things which I may never talk,
I have kept safely in my voids.
You can never know enough
how much I miss you today...
how much I dream with you tomorrow.

I am fed up inside,
listening to these monologues .

Can we
... just
forget ...everything
and cry... for a while, ...
...just once,....
... ... ...together?

......


Sim

A lone drop of water...

My life was dancing ; dazzling at a diamond's pace
Immediately upon she came to her place
Splashing me hard all over her face
A breather , a balm or a pure reprieve
From the sweltering heat
Alas for me it was time to decease
A shimmer on her lovely face
And that was my ultimate feel

Mine was an unconventional tale
Sun shower was my name
Dancing rejoicing though all in vain
Breathing surviving
On a rod of the bus' window I lay
Just after the little boy
Relishing ,rejoicing his own date
took me on his tiny finger
Lonely there I lay
As I near the heaven's gate

Shelly

Death

The last thing on ground

before my brain gets
fragmanted with electric shocks
and the first thing in sky
when my blurry sight reach
the surface of warm lake
is a death.

A death,
unattended,
of pending funeral.

Thick white saliva
is pouring out
and stinking air keeps
filthy vultures away
from this decaying piece
in soiled maroon bedsheet.

Now, never dare
to show sympathies.
If you were to,
you would have set the pyre,
emptied packets of clarified butter
and touched it for just once.

All silences act as
coatings of asphalt
on unfortunate fertile lands
wetted with plethora of mists.


Sim

Fear

A slip of light.
And superfluous oxygen contracts as my frosted pride.
Like pigeons fluttering their wings,
I inhale mouthful of April air and cry.
Each time, when I see it coming
I press my fingers hard to eyes,
Thinking its nothing but inconstruing threads of my mind.
Oh but I am not mighty knight!
It comes barking and then howls like a dog on a moonless night.

No touching fingers!
No, it isn’t the time to eat porridge
Can’t you see my incisors sharp enough?
My heart becomes heavy with broken stone
And a big lump in stomach too.
A universe of cells and celluloid’s conspiring against me
Oh I need a savior!

Why cannot I hear the wrinkle of your toes ??
Why?


A thumb.
No, no, no ….
Don’t suck my thumb,
You have sucked enough of my life.

A Dog

In the queen's palace
there's a dog
closed inside a shack
and feeded the leftover gravy
just before skin shrinks
to burst inside.

The kingdom
is desolated
in the king's absence.

Dog may be loyal
but is, a dog
not a tiger,
not a king.

Can howl, can bark
but can't dictate like a king,
Can walk, can sniff
but can't hunt like a tiger.

These kind of lame dogs
can only come to one use.
They should be barbequed
and served to prisoners.


Sim

Senseles

Whatever colors are painted,
howsoever loud screams get,
limitless tears could be shed;
it will remain
colorless,
soundless
and dry.

Doesn't matter how desperate
tries are,
Regardless of lying
above ground
or below,
it could never
be embraced.

The dreams
of following own shadow
must be burned.
It would never
lead one to return.

Better you accept it
or turn a blind.

-----

Parchhaiyon se meri, main raahon ko tarasta raha
Zindagi bhar yunhi, main sar-e-raah bhatakta raha

Kari bahut koshishen tod dene ko unaki khamoshi
Garm mausam me har baar, sookhe darya bharta raha

Chasm-e-chaahat thi khoye rango ko fir se paane ki
Sookhe hothon se magar, zamin khushk karta raha

Un haawaaon me kahaan zor tha mujhko mitaane ka
Apani saanson se jiya, apani saanson se marta raha

----

Sim

Home

This small house
may have empty white rooms,
and lazy floors of graphite.

Still the anguished Sun cannot burn us,
the weeping clouds cannot drown us
if we stay inside, together,
instead of gazing at the lingering dust.

There may be no food, no water
still we will survive breathing immortal air
fresh everytime as embracing rainbows.

If you don't sense me near,
know that I am out for something
to bring for my only home.
And in your absence,
I hope that you will come back
before I sleep, with your smell.

This life is not very long
that we would spend it wandering
in search of one another,
in drawing rooms or in streets.

But rather, we shall live, caring our home
even if we are alone
as it's nothing but our living dream!

Dreamt in the hues of our hands
when they first met
and living in the layers of eyes
since they last met.


Sim

Tribute

Kudos to every coach
For they trained, taught and thereafter judged
A mind , might and soul
Alas life's pedagogy is a distinct whole
Tricks,twisters
Tests and puzzles
More and more and more
And eventually adore
And teach us our very goal

Poetry and you

If poetry is my child
then you are the mother
of my thoughts.

She wanders room to room
searching for that warmth
which you kept somewhere.

Often she asks me -
"For what did she leave us?"
And I always say -
"She is walking in her sky
gathering all the stars
to fill in your eyes "

At nights when she mumbles,
I move my hands
over her forehead and wish
that you turn your back,
atleast in dreams,
if she is calling you.

I want her to grow
and understand things.
It gets difficult to act
in front of innocent
and say - "Do not cry,
raining nights
make stars go blind"

Many times, I thought to tell her
that you are no longer in our world
and wanted to kill her
like myself.

But isn't a hopeful child
better than a devastated one?

So I shall keep taking her
to every place
where your voice still echo,
clothing her nicely,
putting on long earrings,
as people frequently say
that she looks beautiful
just like you.

And I silently pray god
for her to have
your heart, your feelings too,
but not mine
as they must be lacking something.


Sim

Inspite of

Standing quietly on toes
inside a large wooden box
brimmed with sticky ants-
he looks like me
being rotten, red and queasy.

In voids of sounds,
he hides her silence;
in pulsing sensations,
he carries her absence;
in lakes of stings,
he drowns her dryness ;
in rippling darkness,
he merges her tensions.

Even if heavens fall ,
his raised arms
are thick to holding
their perforated paper sky.


Sim

Open eyes

Every thought would also freeze
like these dusty bubbles
after I keep my hands away.

Why can't I, like everybody,
forget the incompleted dreams?
Incompleted, faded, mute dreams.

But my twisted nerves resemble strings
which sometimes lost winds play.

If there's no red mark in sky
shall I scrape my whole body?
I no longer wish wet flower
to be softly moved against neck,
I want one to dwell on chest.

No matter how much devastated,
there're few places in this heart
still radiating like eastern lands.

These eyes would never tire
but will lose to yours,
for a smile, again,
by closing first.

May be, some dreams
would creep ahead
from where I stopped.


Sim

The truth

.

There are times
when everybody around
seems as an alien
and your thoughts
and your decisions
are not supported.

Even if this outside world
throw stones at you,
don't worry,
it just proves
that you know something
which they don't.


Sim

My vida

Silence never view any one's silence as weakness


Take it as strength .....


Strength to absorb reality without reaction


Strength to move on....


If you cannot hear it


If you cannot read it


don't abuse it


For you will abuse yourself


I am in search of something..


Something of my own..


My purpose to be on this earth...


My truth, my history, my posterity...


My dreams..


I sing for my soul...


I pray to thank thee..


I dance to strengthen my soul..


Words fail but my mind speaks


Reality remains but my heart feels...


I accept my life, I accept my ambience..


But I want to know the intricacies.


Make wisdom, my friend


Knowledge my companion


Climb & shake hands with the pinnacle..


Meet my goal with a smile on my face


Remove every obstacle with a happy soul..


Judge people with utmost intuition


Merry the moments..


Wanna bury the bugs..


Tie my soul with beautiful flowers..


Shine like a star...


during daylight


Sleep like a baby


enjoying the lullaby


Merge my body , my soul


With this earth..


So pure